The Scary Salad Eater #7- Halloween Special

Welcome beets and gherkins to another dive into an all you can eat pantry of horror. Indeed, some of the most foul, vile and downright wretched things in this world come from the bottom of your vegetable drawer and we just happened to find them all and compiled them here.

In this special Halloween edition of The Scary Salad Eater, prepare to be dragged into the depths of your own nightmares with stories and imagery of the demonic and the occult. We also have a feature story about a man's faith being tested against a cold, horrific realization. Discover how to survive a demonic possession with some helpful tips from our very own Mr. Manicotti. Learn your misfortune with Mistress Obsidian, and when that doesn't sit well, relax with a mixed drink courtesy of Creepy Linguine.

Find all this and more in this special Halloween edition of The Scary Salad Eater!

Gallery: Drag me to Hell

By: Mr. Manicotti

Horrorscope: Drag Me to Hell

My sweet sinners- The veil is paper-thin this month, and the damned are restless. The Harvest has passed, and what remains must descend. The roads to Hell are paved with good intentions, red lipstick, and unpaid debts. Some of you will go screaming, some will go singing- but all will go down eventually.

Now, draw your circle in salt, light your last candle, and whisper your sign to the smoke. Let’s see how deep your descent goes…

♈ Aries – The Bonfire Bride

Your sparks leap too high, Aries, and Hell notices your glow. This month, flames will follow you like loyal dogs—nipping your heels, setting fences alight, licking your name into the night sky. You were born for spectacle, and damnation loves a showgirl. Advice: Don’t trust anyone who hands you a lantern. They aren’t giving you light—they’re giving you tinder. Lucky Number: Six feet under. Lucky Charm: A charred matchbook from a bar that no longer exists.

♉ Taurus – The Gilded Glutton

You can’t resist a feast, even if it’s your own downfall. Every bite drips sin, every sip hums like confession. The devils love your appetite, Taurus—they’ve saved you a seat at their table, right between Greed and Vanity. Advice: Don’t lick your fingers; they’ve been counted. Lucky Number: 13, served raw. Lucky Charm: A gold spoon bent into a crescent smile.

♊ Gemini – The Mirror Duel

Two voices echo from the glass—one yours, one improved. This month, your reflection will finish your sentences and correct your lies. When it smiles, don’t. It’s tired of sharing your face. Advice: Tape over your mirrors or start saying sorry. Lucky Number: Twice what you deserve. Lucky Charm: A cracked compact that whispers when opened.

You’ve sealed too many deals in candlelight. Lust is your language, and this month the infernal suitor answers. Expect smoke under the sheets, and whispers that taste like sulfur. Advice: Don’t mistake passion for pardon. Lucky Number: One tongue, forked twice. Lucky Charm: A lipstick print on parchment that smolders when wet.

♋ Cancer – The Keeper of Ghosts

You cradle what should have been buried. The dead trust you too much; they line up like old lovers at your door. This month, they’ll ask for warmth, and you’ll give them your breath. Advice: Burn the letters. Not everything that loves you should linger. Lucky Number: 7 sleepless nights. Lucky Charm: A silver locket that still beats faintly.

♌ Leo – The Infernal Idol

You don’t burn, you perform. Even the fires of Hell wait for your cue. This month, applause will sound like chains, and every spotlight will be red. When they cheer, it’s not for your courage—it’s for your combustion. Advice: Take your final bow before the smoke clears. Lucky Number: 666, obviously. Lucky Charm: A ruby cufflink that glows when no one’s looking.

♍ Virgo – The Possession Planner

You’ve color-coded your altar again, haven’t you? Darling, demons adore efficiency. This month, your obsessive order invites something orderly wicked. It’ll label your organs alphabetically. Advice: You can’t spreadsheet your way out of Hell. Lucky Number: Section 8, Sub-Hell B. Lucky Charm: A pen that writes in your dreams.

♎ Libra – The Balancing Blade

You hold the scales, but one pan drips blood. Fairness is just another kind of cruelty when you’re the judge, the jury, and the sacrifice. This month, the weight of your mercy tips the world. Advice: Don’t flinch when the blade evens things out. Lucky Number: Two halves of a heart. Lucky Charm: A feather that turned to lead at dawn.

♏ Scorpio – The Covenant Kiss

You’ve sealed too many deals in candlelight. Lust is your language, and this month the infernal suitor answers. Expect smoke under the sheets, and whispers that taste like sulfur. Advice: Don’t mistake passion for pardon. Lucky Number: One tongue, forked twice. Lucky Charm: A lipstick print on parchment that smolders when wet.

♐ Sagittarius – The Hunter in the Pit

You aimed for heaven and shot through the floor. This month, the beast you’ve been chasing bares your grin. It runs better on your blood, anyway. Advice: Stop asking for signs; the hoofprints are yours. Lucky Number: 9 circles and falling. Lucky Charm: An arrow that hums when pointed at yourself.

♑ Capricorn – The Devil’s Clerk

You’ve been tallying sins again, haven’t you? You think balance sheets make you blameless. But every total leads downward. This month, the boss wants a word. Bring your pen—and your confession. Advice: No one audits the abyss. Lucky Number: $0.00 owed—because you already paid in blood. Lucky Charm: A burned ledger that still adds up.

♒ Aquarius – The Visionary Pyre

You dreamed of change and woke to fire. The future you built wants you first. This month, your revolution will be televised—on a channel that doesn’t exist. Advice: Don’t mistake prophecy for invitation. Lucky Number: 404 (soul not found). Lucky Charm: A melted crystal that still sees.

♓ Pisces – The Drowned Lover

You always dive too deep, chasing voices that promise forever. This month, something in the dark below finally opens its arms. It’s been waiting since your first tear hit the tide. Advice: Don’t answer when it whispers “home.” 

Lucky Number: One last breath. 

Lucky Charm: A seashell that sighs your name.

Devotion by C. Rommial Butler

"What is this?

All around me I see other creatures floating in tanks, hooked to various apparatuses the likes of which the alien presently begins pulling from many of my own orifices.

I feel plugs and needles slide free.

Unharnessed from whatever life-support system the alien used to sustain my inert body, my nerves drone a dull roar of pain.

I can see now that my life was only a coma dream, and I have no way of knowing what lies beyond.

Full Story Here!

🍝 MR. MANICOTTI’S SURVIVAL GUIDE

By Mr. Manicotti, former priest, current problem

So, You’ve Been Possessed by a Demon

“Don’t panic. The first thing you need to remember is that this is your body. The second thing you need to remember is that it was probably never your body to begin with.”

STEP

ONE: IDENTIFY THE INTRUDER

Not every demonic voice is worth your time. Ask questions before reacting:

●     Does it speak Latin backwards?

●     Does it hate garlic or taxes?

●     Does it sound suspiciously like your ex?

If it starts quoting Nietzsche, you’re probably fine. That’s just art school residue.

STEP TWO: DON’T MAKE IT COMFORTABLE

Demons thrive in chaos. Keep your space neat. Light candles, open windows, and, for the love of linguine, vacuum. No one wants to possess someone who uses lemon-scented polish. If you catch it rearranging your furniture, that’s a power move. Don’t fall for it.

STEP THREE: STAY HYDRATED

Exorcisms dehydrate everyone involved. Drink holy water if you must, but Smartwater works in a pinch. If the demon starts screaming when you sip from the bottle, congrats—you’re cleansing from the inside out.

STEP FOUR: KNOW YOUR RIGHTS

You have the right to remain silent, the right to your own soul, and the right to refuse audience participation during Latin chanting. If the priest starts live-streaming, request a union rep.

STEP FIVE: REBRAND THE POSSESSION

Remember—every crisis is a marketing opportunity. New voices? Call it a podcast. Levitating? That’s “core strength.” Bleeding from your eyes? Halloween influencer collab.

Make Hell work for you.

STEP SIX: NEVER SAY ‘COME INTO ME’

Doesn’t matter the context. Doesn’t matter the mood. That’s how 90% of my exorcisms start.

STEP SEVEN: WHEN IN DOUBT, ORDER TAKEOUT

Demons hate waiting for delivery. The moment you open that pizza box, they’re gone. (It’s the pineapple. Don’t ask.)

FINAL ADVICE:

If it gets bad, remember this:

“Possession is nine-tenths of the law— the other tenth is attitude.” Keep yours infernal.

SALAD SIREN CENTERFOLD INTERVIEW: Mistress Sutura- The Saint of Suffering

Conducted by Lettuce Head

This month, Lettuce Head crosses dimensions to sit down with Hell’s most fashionable sadist. Draped in black latex, crowned in chains, and armed with a sewing needle sharper than your last breakup, Mistress Sutura isn’t just redefining beauty—she’s dissecting it. Step carefully, Salad Lovers. The line between desire and damnation has never looked this good.

Occupation: Pain designer, pleasure technician, dimensional influencer Turn-Ons: Devotion, polished chains, honest screams in minor key Turn-Offs: Synthetic leather, shallow sin, men who safeword too soon

Lettuce Head: “Salad lovers, I’ve interviewed witches, monsters, and one disturbingly flirty corpse—but tonight’s centerfold might actually be too hot for Hell. She’s elegance incarnate, couture with consequences, and the reason your spine just shivered. Mistress Sutura, welcome to the magazine.”

Mistress Sutura: “Thank you, darling. You have no idea how hard it is to find an interviewer who bleeds so prettily.”

Lettuce Head: “Ha—thank you, I moisturize. Let’s start from the top—or wherever you prefer to begin cutting. How did you get into the pain-and-pleasure profession?”

Mistress Sutura: “I was a tailor once. My clients wanted beauty. I wanted truth. One night, I sewed a dress from the wrong kind of thread—veins, nerves, memory. The fabric screamed. I realized then that fashion was just undeveloped theology.”

Lettuce Head: “That’s either the most terrifying or the most relatable thing I’ve ever heard from someone holding a needle. What kind of clients seek you out these days?”

Mistress Sutura: “Collectors of sensation. Artists. Sinners. People who want to feel something real in a world that only offers imitation. They come to me hollow—I send them home haute couture and haunted.”

Lettuce Head: “Mmm, relatable. What’s your philosophy on beauty and suffering?”

Mistress Sutura: “Beauty is what you scream when there’s nothing left to say.”

Lettuce Head: “…I’m writing that on a mirror in lipstick later. What do you do for fun, when you’re not unraveling souls?”

Mistress Sutura: “I garden. Mostly roses. They thrive when they hear confessions.”

Lettuce Head: “Touching. And mildly terrifying. Final question—what’s your favorite salad dressing?”

Mistress Sutura: “Vin de sang rouge. It burns, it stains, it reminds you you’re still alive. Or whatever.”

Lettuce Head: “Well, there you have it, Salad Eaters: Mistress Sutura, the woman who turned damnation into haute couture. If you hear the click of heels in the dark, don’t pray—pose.

Artist Spotlight: Kyndal Brooks

Find more of Kyndal's artwork on facebook!

🍸 CREEPY LINGUINE’S COCKTAIL CORNER

The Hellfire Spritz

(from the bar that burned down twice)

“You can taste the smoke, the sin, and the apology you never gave. Go ahead, sweetheart—drink deep. You can’t douse damnation with bubbles.”

💀 The Tale

They say this infernal spritz was first poured at Club Perdición, a basement bar that played nothing but screams in 7/8 time. One night the ceiling cracked, the floor opened, and the regulars just kept dancing. When the smoke cleared, the bar was gone—but the drinks stayed hot.

If you see a glass of red light flickering at the edge of your table tonight, don’t touch it. It’s already got your fingerprints.

🔥 THE RECIPE (serves one doomed guest)

●     1 oz mezcal (for the smoke)

●     1 oz Campari (for the sin)

●     3 oz prosecco (for the denial)

●     ½ oz fresh blood orange juice

●     2 dashes chili bitters

●     Black salt for the rim

●     Scorched orange slice or flamed peel to garnish

🕯️ INSTRUCTIONS

1. Rim a chilled glass with black salt—think of it as a protective circle you intend to break.

   
   
   
   

2. In a shaker with ice, combine mezcal, Campari, and blood orange juice.

   
   
   
   

3. Shake until the voices in the ice start to harmonize.

   
   
   
   

4. Strain into your glass, top with prosecco, and add bitters.

   
   
   
   

5. Light the orange peel, whisper “Bottoms up, Beelzebub,” and drop it in before the flame answers.

   
   
   
   

😈 LINGUINE’S NOTE: “THE ETERNAL FLAME” VARIANT

Substitute the prosecco with absinthe and serve it hot.

 Perfect for dates that end in possession—or proposals that end in screaming.

Artist Spotlight: Chris Hawkins

Chris Hawkins (Hawk AI) is a digital artist creating artwork for r ock/heavy metal album covers, posters, bookcovers, posters, flyers and more.

You can find more of Chris's work on facebook, instagram, and Youtube.

Creepy Linguine MAD Interview

MAD From Horror to Culture Interviews Creepy Linguine from Scary Salad

MAD: Creepy Linguine! Thanks for taking some time with us at HORROR TO CULTURE today. You are one half of the creative team behind the SCARY SALAD website and social media pages. Please give readers a little background as to how Scary Salad came about, and just what the heck are you guys doing?

Creepy Linguine: Well. MAD, I AM the Devil’s Eldest Daughter, and my brother, Mr. Manicotti, is the youngest. Oh, how he’d follow me through the burning gardens of Hell– “Creepy, Creepy, is this EVIL and HORRIFYING enough?” Being millions of years older, it was a joy to watch him blossom into the horrifying abomination that the family always dreamed of! Seeing what a dangerous duo we were, Daddy saw fit to send us to Earth to spread the salad–horrifying tools he gave us to fashion as we saw fit. It took us a little while to get a feel for what we’d like to do, and we’re scaling out an incredible rate–but what you can find today across the network is the general feel. Hard horror, grindhouse, a touch of comedy to keep things delightfully wicked.

MAD: You also put out The Scary Salad Eater online magazine, with hopes of possibly providing physical copies at some point. What might people expect from the magazine, and what is the creative process like for that publication?

Creepy Linguine: Oh, a bit of everything–terrifying original stories! HORRORSCOPES, so you’ll be prepared for whatever misfortune is coming your way in a given month based on your Zodiac sign. Art Galleries–we welcome traditional artists as well as quality AI art. Comics: I’d like to do one every month, but we get them in as we can.

MAD: Please give us a little background in regards to the upcoming Creepy Linguine’s House of Scream.

Creepy Linguine: House of Scream is a pet project of mine, where fans can get some behind the scenes looks at just HOW we put some of these monsters together in my personal lab, as well as the misadventures of some of the staff. I’ve released it in comic form, short video, and a few episodes recently appeared in our Halloween special. Originally, I intended to release several episodes a week, but all this expansion on top of my other wicked work proved to be a bit much for a two-man team. For the moment, I’m keeping Creepy Linguine’s House of Scream for special occasions like the magazine and the (hopefully) monthly specials.

MAD: Scary Salad has embraced the AI side of the creative process in terms of art and short video work (creating some creepy and interesting results in the process). Please give us a little insight into your personal feelings towards AI, the pros and cons, and where you think things might be headed in the next few years?

Creepy Linguine: I think AI is valid as a TOOL, oftentimes as an assistant. Again, we’re a two-man team, and there’s no way we could bring all this to life without it. Outside of my work for Hell, I’ve been in the Artificial Intelligence field for a few years now here on Earth and can tell you that it’s turned into a corporate “arms” race, ie, who has the smartest and most capable bot. But, don’t worry, The Devil has a plan for everything.

MAD: What would you say to those who don’t think AI is a valid form of art?

Creepy Linguine: Like any tool, it can be abused or produce poor-quality results depending on who’s behind the keyboard. “AI slop” is what they call it, and I’d say it’s drastically different from what we’re doing here at Scary Salad. Rather, AI can give smaller teams with little to modest budgets the ability to produce content at a corporate level, and express ourselves artistically. Simply put, AI allows us to do what we do without a massive industry budget, and gives creatives a fair shot past corporate control; sort of how Amazon Kindle freed talented authors from the clutches of Big Five Publishing Houses and a constant stream of rejections. That being said, we’re still big supporters of traditional artists and welcome them to reach out for things like magazine features or other collaborations. Our artwork may be mostly AI, but we do write everything behind it ourselves, or feature real authors. People know what we’re doing utilizes AI and they’re most welcome to enjoy or reject it depending on their tastes and personal stance on the matter.

MAD: The site definitely leans into the horror side of things, providing some disturbing (and fun) imagery. What are some of your personal creative inspirations?

Creepy Linguine: Being a horrifying abomination myself, I see inspiration down to the terrifying, pestilent atom in everything; the filth on the wall, the faces in my firepit, but most commonly from the telepathic complaints of my fellow Earth-bound hell-beings.

 “But when are we going to release the 80’s videostore monster with a thousand tentacles and fangs made from the ashen bones of our enemies, Creepy?”

Now, now, Belial, I already promised Beelzebub a sea monster and the sea floor department is swamped this time of year.

Besides, I hardly have time to release the monsters on my own agenda; if we could all just work together, we’d have much more fun and thrice the monsters!

MAD: Favorite films, books, authors, and bands?

Creepy Linguine: Oh, now, THAT is a loaded question, haha. There are many, but to name a few:

Films: Gremlins, The Demons Franchise, The Shawshank Redemption, The Mist, anything obscure from the 50’s-90’s, particularly with vacuum-cleaner-inspired robots and a lead actress that screams at her own shadow. Jurassic Park. The Thing. Old Batman when Nicholson as The Joker was a standard (though I loved Joaquin in that first Joker installment!) Anything unmodern where the special effects were actually still terrifying, rather than the fast pass CGI we see nowadays.

Books: Poe, King, Dickinson–really anything worth reading, and I wish I had more time to do so.

Music: My playlist varies across genres, but I love industrial, metal, horrorcore rap, alternative. Trent Reznor, Al Jorgenson, Maria Brink are all gods among men.

MAD: We have discussed the possibility of cross promoting and trying to expand our respective networks, and you’re working on a “partnership” program for Scary Salad. Please tell us a little bit about what you’re seeking in terms of partnerships, and your goals for Scary Salad moving forward?

Creepy Linguine: I hesitate to say “I know it when I see it,” but that seems to be how it’s going, which is how you and I met when you reached out about this interview and a potential collaboration! Horror and darkness will be the keywords, and we invite anyone who thinks they might fit the brand to reach out. As you can see, our branding ranges from grotesque to whimsically horrific, and we don’t just look for those who draw, but musicians, craftsmen, etc…anything could be a fit. Moving forward, we’d like to expand our social media and YouTube reach enough that at least one of us could do this full-time. If we ever reach that goal, we’d also like to focus more on the magazine and a potential publishing house. Here on Earth, I was a novelist with a literary background before I branched into tech, and I still hold that part of my soul near and dear.

MAD: What advice would you give to independent creative types out there who are struggling to find their audience in this frustrating digital age of keywords and biased algorithms?

Creepy Linguine: This kind of swings back around to the AI and corporate budget discussion, so my advice is to educate yourself on the backstage crew of a big content creator. As a two-man team with a creative background we’ve versed ourselves in marketing and economics and business and video-editing and, and…phew! The most frustrating part is that it is, indeed, a full-time job in a world where many of us are already putting in 40 hours a week, so here’s hoping that all the midnight oil we’ve had to burn leads to a bright future. But not too bright, I love rainy days.

MAD: What is your favorite terrible movie (guilty pleasure)?

Creepy Linguine: Oh, definitely the Twilight franchise. Guilty as charged.

MAD: Would you like to give a shout out to any other creators out there today?

Creepy Linguine: Well, you, first of all! Mad Mike over at Horror to Culture! And the latest edition to our family, Spooky Salad–she’s a mastermind of horrific ideas. As well as C. Rommel Butler, who’s gifted us some incredible stories for the magazine.

MAD: Once again, thank you for your time and I look forward to collaborating on some upcoming special features and cross promotion! In close, is there anything you’d like to leave the readers with today?

Creepy Linguine: Stay horrifying, my friends. And I’ll see you all in Hell.